H.K., CO 

I have recently in the last couple of months made a conscious decision to participate in groups on facebook. There are a ton of communities that form on there on the daily, to help you in so many ways.

I opted to join a mommy group where all moms in the world gather to share their feelings, struggles, jokes, videos, life, experieces, and so forth. It allows women from all walks of life to meet, help one another digitally, and even get to know other women from the same location as them. 


I had posted a comment on the group wall, to share my struggle with my mom doubts. To keep it short, I received a ton of good suggestions, advice and even some that were downright judgemental and rude. But like everything in life, you take it with a grain of salt. 
I am writing today to let you know that in these experiences we choose to take-on digitally, you sometimes find a person or two who epitomizes the definition of humble, sweet, loving, and kind. 

I am sharing with you about a woman I met over this mommy group who I’ll call, H.K. In the last few weeks that I have gotten to know her (yes, we added each other as friends), she has proved to be more of a friend to me than a random person you stumbled upon in person.

 

It’s strange to see how friendships can be made online with people you’ve never met.


But she is so open, so kind in all she says, that it would have been an opportunity lost in making long-distance friendships (i dont know if she thinks we’re friends now), but i certainly feel she’s a good person to be digitally friends with and if ever in person. 

You all probably think I’m crazy for being so trusting. But the thing is, in the time we live in, everyone fends for themselves. Everyone jumps in a cage full of beasts that attack the minute you step-in. There are reasons we all have why we seek communities as such. It’s been a huge thing in the last several years to connect with people from all over the world. So what’s the fear?

 

No one ever trusts anyone, anymore. 

H.K., participates in this mommy group full-time. I see her comments on most of the post on there and she is nothing but always kind. She stands up for people. She isn’t afraid to lead with kindness above all things. She spews out love in all her comments, support, and understanding. And she shares the most uplifting experiences of motherhood.

I often see inconsistency in the commentators on there who participate full-time. Sometimes they’re positive, sometimes they’re judgemental. Well, not H.K.

I share this because this is the type of values we should share in the world. For women to have each others back NO MATTER WHAT! It is hard enough already to go through motherhood, without a book. But to find other women who will take on this journey with you with support, kindness, love, makes this journey a little bit easier. It allows one mother to bounce off ideas, doubts, and concerns with another and find common ground to help each other, even if it’s just emotionally. 

Is that not amazing? 

Have any of you connected with other moms out there? 

MM, out! 

My Open-letter to J <3

It has been very challenging for us lately. I don’t know if ‘challenging’ even comes close to expressing what we’re going through. The turbulence in our life as of late has us, struggling to figure our way through, but I know we’ll get through it because I have you. 

You have been my strength lately, the crutch that gets me through the day, the voice that sees me through the moments. You’re the creases that form my smile, the laughter in my sorrow. You’re the reassurance in my doubts, the comfort in my falls. You’re the one who heals my heart when its broken, and the life that continues to give when mine is low. 

Thank you for being there. Thank you for being silent when all is loud. Thank you for the constant reminder that in all of this, I always have you.


MM, out!

When Peanut Butter hits the fan

It has been quite hard on J and me lately. We’ve found ourselves misunderstanding each other, and unable to find the string that connects us. It’s not rare for these moments to occur, especially when you’re parenting three kids, tending to life on the daily, and crossing off responsibilities on the constant. It’s very hard for J and me to have a moment alone. We don’t ever get the chance to go on dates, alone, or have a moment to hear ourselves converse. It gets tricky when you have children (I’m sure you can all relate to this).

Well? What happens when you’ve had just enough of parenting, and you try to find each other through the dirt, the mess, and the chaos of being parents? You sometimes don’t. So I guess, that’s what’s happening with us. We’re getting all our times mixed-up, and our priorities for each other lost.

I miss him. I see him everyday. We don’t ever get to cuddle anymore. The kids are always occupying the space between us. I wanna tell him secrets. The kids will hear. I miss holding him, as I fall asleep. Arty’s taken my spot, and the arm I used to cling to.

He mentioned we should get a babysitter or a nanny, so we could go out. I spent ten minutes after that telling him with anxiety how terrible I feel about it. I couldn’t imagine leaving my kids with a stranger, because I want a moment to myself. That’s the thing. I don’t know what I’m willing to give up. I feel like the juggle can only be done by me. The feeling of leaving the kids with a total stranger, just boggles my mind. I couldn’t. What if something happens to my babies? Why shouldn’t I be the first to be there, if they ever got hurt. What if that stranger is bad? Ugh. What am I willing to give up for a couple of ours of J & M-time?

My heart feels a little heavy lately. I can’t seem to find the string that connects J and me. It bothers me because we’re important too.

Any words of wisdom?

 

xo, MM

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